Tuesday, October 27, 2009
The new ME.
Today I feel so overwhelmed by life and its doings that I can barely breathe. And I don't truly have the option to go back to bed and pull the covers over my head like I want to do. Its all those piddly fucking little things that pile up on you, y'know? Like laundry....again. I have a mountain of clean clothes to fold and separate into baskets for their owners. I didn't do it before because as each load was done, I was busy with other shit and let the mountain grow. It will take less than an hour to sort ou. This I know from experience but in that hour I could also be doing about eleventy million other things that really do need doing.
Halloween costumes: I need to sew a wizard robe from silver satin before Friday night because I work Saturday and cannot do it last minute. And create his staff and belt sacks of magical stuffs. I need to thrift shop a suit to turn into a zombie costume. They wear the clothes they were buried in, yes? Again...before Friday..Oh yeah...also because of school party...shit!
AND don't forget pumpkin buying and carving with the kids.
My wonderful sister has a big birthday TOMORROW and even though I have it ON the calendar and meant to get the card last week, I still managed to fuck up and forget to buy the fucking card.
Yesterday with the costume fabric shopping and black and white themed dance shirt shopping, I forgot ALSO to pick up the Lysine I asked the vet to bring in for me to give to Harley in the off chance miracle that an amaino acid supplement could help him. Long shot, I agree.
Sick cat tending: he needs to eat if he's going to get well and he does not want to have anything except cream. That he willingly devours with gusto. Home-made cat puree, watered down canned food, Nutrical high calorie cat supplement gel...all are fought off wildly and mainly land on whatever I am wearing so not only am I looking and feeling like a crazy cat lady...I REEK of it. Seriously. All I need is the grey wild hair and the stench of cat piss and I'm that crazy lady on the Simpsons. Its not funny in real life.
Slipper knitting: we have bare floors and its COLD. The kids are asking me for them and I have one pair done but they are as slippery as all get out so NOW I am sewing patches of Duck Easy Liner shelf liner stuff to the bottoms and that is easy yet time consuming. Maybe be faster to just glue it to all my floors? Or at least the stairs?
Floors: they are so gross...lets not even go there but they need a serious cleaning before winter shuts us all up with the dirt and germs.
Germs: that fucking flu is freaking me out lately. I was pretty laissez faire about it until last week. Should we vaccinate? Shouldn't we? How many containers of Lysol wipes and anti viral kleenex should I stock pile? How to keep the news from my scared children that a 13 yr old kid died from it on the weekend in TO (allegedly) after I was calmly reassuring them that since I will be able to look after them and nurse them should they catch the flu, they will be fine, no worries, relax. They hear stuff though and come to me a bit scared/worried. Especially Cameron, my worrier. He is SO me in a different form. Acts up to hide his real feelings, a tease and button pusher, under achiever, funny, but very sensitive which is hard to remember because he tries so hard to act like he doesn't care. But he does...today he was worrying about Harley and crying because he missed Newman, which we thought he din't mind at all because when faced with the news of no more Newnie Noo he was unconcerned..apparently an act. His cat death worries and flu fears came to a head this morning. Poor guy.
Little stuff: like meals, and vacuuming, and dishwasher loading and unloading, kitchen clean ups, bathroom clean ups, homework supervision (such as it is), sleeping, eating, breathing... and all those other things that go into looking after a family like being able to hug them without screaming "Not Now! Don't you see how swamped I am???". I have to fit that shit in there too.
How do other people do this and not lose their minds and not only have everything done but are HAPPY about it ???
Posted by Ali P at 9:58 AM